I'm a woman

I'm a woman
Photos copyright Laurence Gouault
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Friday 17 December 2010

Running stuff, and other stuff, by Stevie Haston.

I like running, trouble is I like other stuff too. What to do with your time, how to divide time, share it, apportion it, is always a major problem. I try to keep a lot of time for myself, but seem to be running out. And of course the worst is that some activities are counterproductive, they don’t actually help each other or go hand in hand; you know all this. So the other day when I went climbing at a hard venue I couldn’t get my lightest harness on because my legs are too big! Too much pizza, too much running! So what? Well I like being reasonable at stuff, I don’t like being a total woose, and the other day at the cliff, I could barely lift my treelike legs to the appropriate footholds. Yes so I am ok at running you say, well not exactly, I am worse than a scrubber at running. I was a few months ago just below the top standard in climbing and now I have screwed it up. To become a reasonable runner I would have to do some serious redesigning of the Haston chassis, so will I?

I have some desire to enjoy this incredible winter, I live in an astounding place, with extraordinary mountains all around, but in which way shall I enjoy it? I was invited to race an 18km run over snow the other day and knew I would come nowhere, so declined. I could have done it for the camaraderie I guess. It boils down to ego and wanting to look good, and it’s sad that I am not over it at my age but there you go.

Big legs, alpine climbers legs are not compatible with hard rock climbing. Rock climber’s spindles don’t work well potholing thru sodden powder at 3000 meters. Flexibility is not normally encountered in runners, you just can’t seem to be very good at more than one thing, it’s a big pain, and my body doesn’t help, it wants to be big, it doesn’t want to be light. So much sport seems to be dependant (to me) on being an exact shape or weight. Anyway going back to when I used to do a little Marshall arts I only did well at welterweight, when I ran at my best I was 8 lbs lighter, When I did my best Alpine climbing I was 128 lbs, hard to believe when I look at myself in the mirror, but easy to understand when I look at my watch at the end of a run. So the answer is simple, get rid of zee fat, that’s right folks, I am going to chop off my head, 16 lbs of useless fat.